Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban

Dementors have arrived at Hogwarts. Those dreadful creatures hidden beneath their cloaks that suck the happiness right out of you.

We’ll talk more about how to deal with them before they knock you down. But what’s the preferred pick me up when you get attacked?

A little chocolate. (Hah!) Which, is known to boost our moods and improve our microbiome so…

But! Let’s stick to 70%+ dark chocolate (which reduces the amount of sugar) and limit ourselves to 1 ounce per day. (The last time I got a little sick I took the whole “chocolate is good for you” thing a little too far and found myself eating a whole bar a day. Laughing. Caught up to me.)

And, of course, remember that when we get knocked down by the dementors in our lives, that’s the time to be EVEN MORE committed to our protocol and keep our bright line commitments to ourselves so we don’t spin out of control right when we need to stay centered!

The boggart!

Yet another one of Rowling’s genius creations. So… The boggart is a shapeshifter. It assumes the form of what most frightens us. It’s different for everyone. (What’s your boggart look like? :)

The best way to deal with a boggart? Our wise Professor Lupin tells us there are two primary weapons against our fear: 1. Friends and 2. Laughter.

A boggart doesn’t know what shape he should assume when there’s more than one person around. Therefore, hanging out with your friends when a boggart is lurking is a good idea. :)

And… The way to REALLY take care of the boggart? LAUGHTER! Of course, there’s a charm for that as well. This one “is simple, yet it requires force of mind.”

Repeat after me, please: Riddikulus!

You may recall that Neville’s greatest fear was Snape. Professor Lupin coached him to imagine Snape dressed up as his grandmother—wearing a tall hat with a stuffed vulture on top. Plus a long green dress, a fox-fur scarf, and a big, red handbag. Imagining Snape dressed like that? RIDDIKULUS!

Enter: Laughter. Exit: Fear.

So… What are you most afraid of?

Can you dress it up in something absurd and give it the old Riddikulus! charm?!

The only thing worthy of our fear? Fear itself.

You might have noticed this is a recurring theme. We touched on it in the prior two Notes in the series. Recall that we had Dumbledore telling Harry: “Call him Voldemort, Harry. Always use the proper name for things. Fear of a name increases fear of the thing itself.”

It’s impossible for me to read that and not think of Franklin Roosevelt’s wisdom from his first inauguration: “So, first of all, let me assert my firm belief that the only thing we have to fear is… fear itself — nameless, unreasoning, unjustified terror which paralyzes needed efforts to convert retreat into advance.”

(This 30-second clip of FDR giving that speech is worth a goosebumps-inducing view.)

Ralph Waldo Emerson had something to say about this as well. Here’s how he put it: “Fear is an instructor of great sagacity and the herald of revolutions. One thing he teaches, that there is rottenness where he appears.”

The only effective, rational, courageous response to fear? As Emerson advised: ALWAYS do the thing you fear. BRING IT ON! That, and a little Riddikulus! does the trick. :)

The Patronus Charm.

Yet another (!) one of J.K. Rowling’s magical touches. Want to fight the despair of the encroaching dementors? Only one thing will do…

You must concentrate, WITH ALL YOUR MIGHT, on a single, very happy memory. And, note, this requires such mental strength that “many qualified wizards have difficulty with it.” :)

As we’ve discussed, when I read to Emerson we like to pause and reflect on what we’re reading. Here’s the sequence in this section:

Me: “What’s your happiest memory?”

E: (After thinking about it for a moment) “The day Eleanor was born.”

Me: (After dropping my jaw and mouthing “Wow.”) “That’s one of mine, too.”

“You know another one of my happiest moments? The day YOU were born.”

“And you know what another one is? The day your mommy and I got married. We told each other that we love each other so much that we wanted to spend our entire lives together. And maybe one day we’d be lucky enough to have kids.

E: “And, you did! Two!!”

Me: “We never dreamt we’d be so lucky to have a kid as wonderful as you.”

*misty smiles + cuddles*

(I’m still astonished (!) that was his answer. We had both Emerson and Eleanor at home in almost the *exact* same spot right by our bed. Emerson was 4 1/2 when Eleanor was born and was there (with his Nama) for the whole process.)

So… Spotlight on you and YOUR Patronus Charm.

What are YOUR happiest memories?! Seriously. Think about it for a moment.

Give me one awesome memory! _____________________________________

Science agrees: The Charm works. If you can get yourself to concentrate (with all your might!) on those happy memories you can’t, at the same time, be anxious or depressed. Not possible. Try it.

Here’s how renowned researcher Robert Emmons puts it in Thanks!: “The basic observation that positive emotions are somehow incompatible with negative emotions is not a new idea and has been demonstrated over several decades. Back in the 1950s, this basic principle of emotional incompatibility provided the basis of behavioral therapies designed to treat phobias and other anxiety disorders. One simply cannot be relaxed and stressed at the same time. Try it. You can’t. Relaxation drives out anxiety and vice versa. The Buddha said that ‘Hatred cannot coexist with loving-kindness, and dissipates if supplanted with thoughts based on loving-kindness.’ You cannot be grateful and resentful at the same time, or forgiving and vengeful. When we are savoring the moment we cannot be regretting the past.”

It takes practice to pull off the Patronus when those dementors are charging. Not all wizards can master it. But… You’ve got this!

Let’s practice now. Think of a super happy moment. Take a deep breath in. Smile. Exhale. Feel the joy of that memory deep in your soul. Hold up your wand. EXPECTO PATRONUS!!

Here we are at the end of the story. Harry just saved everyone from the dementors by conjuring an epic Patronus. As Hermione says, that’s some advanced magic. How’d he pull that off?

He knew he could do it because he’d already done it. (And he’d practiced a ton!) In this case, we had the benefit of Hermione’s little locket that turned back time. In our case, we want to see how many different ways we can do the impossible by doing it before we really do it. :)

First, let’s start with this gem from the scientists who wrote Make It Stick: “Let’s return to the old saw ‘If you think you can, or you think you can’t, you’re right.’ It turns out there is more truth here than wit. Attitude counts for a lot.”

They tell us about Carol Dweck and her research on the growth mindset. If you THINK you can get better and do something, you’re right. Why? Because you’ll actually try. If you *don’t* think you can do something, you’ll never do the work necessary to even have a shot. So…

Then how about the science of “self-efficacy”—or believing you can do what you want to do? Albert Bandura tells us that there are four keys: 1. Mastery Experience (aka, you’ve had prior success); 2. Vicarious Learning (you’ve seen someone else do it and think, “If they can do it so can I!”); 3. Social persuasion (someone tells you that you can do it!); 4. Physiology (you ACT like a successful person: “Eat, Move, Sleep, Breathe like a champ!”).

Navy SEAL Commander Mark Divine tells us we need to win FIRST in our minds. Then on the battlefield. While Robin Sharma tells us that things are always created twice: “first in the workshop of the mind and then, and only then, in reality.” He calls that “blueprinting.”

Then we have gold-medal winning peak performance coach Lanny Bassham. In With Winning in Mind, he tells us that “You can imagine far more than you currently can achieve. If you consistently rehearse what you want to achieve, what you imagine can become reality.”

He proved it with his own example when he “wanted to set the record at 400, a perfect score. But I had never actually fired a 400, even in training. Nonetheless, I vividly rehearsed shooting the first 100, then another and another. I visualized each of the last ten shots building toward the record. I rehearsed what I knew would happen at that point: I would realize that I was above the record. Next, I rehearsed hearing a voice say, ‘That’s OK. I do this all the time.’ Then I imagined shooting the final ten easily and saying to myself, ‘Another 400, that’s like me.’

I rehearsed this sequence several times a day for two months. In my first competition since beginning the rehearsal, I started with a 100 kneeling. My next two targets were also 100s. I began my last series with ten, ten, ten, ten. Only five more to go. Ten. Ten. Ten. Then reality set in. I was above the record. I heard an internal voice say, ‘That’s OK, I do this all the time.’ I shot two additional tens, setting the national record at a perfect 400.”

Harry’s version, “That’s like me. I just conjured an epic Patronus. Let’s do this!”

What’s yours? Let’s win first in your mind. Think of some past successes. See success in this project. Know you can do it, because you’ve already done it.