The Art of Mental Training

Alrighty.

Let’s start by identifying the WHY of mental training. When you look at your best and worst performances in your life, what made the difference between the two?

*insert jeopardy music here*

If you’re like most athletes and other people aspiring to perform at a high level, you’ll probably admit that it came down to a mental difference—you were either super on mentally. Or not.

As DC advises, once we reach a certain level, the primary difference is mental. And, to even GET to that certain level of mastery, the primary driver is mental. Who’s going to train hard enough/put in enough hard work to even get to a high level of performance?

Exactly. The person who has a strong mind.

Now, it’s time to get that mind of yours stronger. Here are some brilliant ideas from DC on how to do that.

Obviously, if we want a strong mind—to become a Champion/Mental Warrior as DC says throughout the book—we need to get in charge of our attitude.

This passage reminds me of a few things.

First, Martin Seligman, one of the world’s leading researchers and positive psychologists, echoes the importance of seeing setbacks as temporary. He tells us about the science behind Learned Optimism (see Notes) and that as we learn optimism we’ll not only optimize our performance but also optimize our emotional and immunological well-being. (As we know, optimism is huge.)

And, a strong attitude allows us to see setbacks as not only temporary but as catalysts for our next stage of growth. We are no longer fragile—broken to pieces when things don’t go as planned. We become anti-fragile—where challenges/setbacks actually MAKE US STRONGER.

There’s only one way you can achieve that level of mastery: a *really* strong mind.

This is genius.

Reminds me of former Navy SEAL Mark Divine’s wisdom in his great book, Unbeatable Mind (see Notes). I just love it when two great writers echo each other so closely.

Here’s how Mark puts it: “Negativity destroys performance, so it is crucial to train to move from witnessing negative thoughts to starving them and feeding the positive. This is the specific process:

I. Witness negativity.
II. Interdict, or stop, the negative thoughts with a power statement.
III. Redirect your mind with self-talk and imagery to something positive and productive for your current goal.
IV. Maintain your new mental state with a jingle or mantra.”

That’s in the context of a chapter where he talks about STARVING the fear wolf and feeding the courage wolf. Starving our negative thoughts. Interdicting the negative thoughts (love that word—it’s a military term that basically means to bomb them :) then redirecting our minds to focus on the positive.

Again, it takes a strong (!) mind to a) witness the negative thought in the first place—vs. getting so carried away by them that you just unconsciously spiral down + b) step in and STOP them + c) insert positive self-talk.

That takes practice. So, let’s start that practice TODAY. The very next time you find your internal chit-chat getting negative, INTERRUPT it immediately. (You could even tell yourself “STOP!”) Fire off positive self-talk. Phrases I like include, “I’ve got this!” + “Let’s do this!!”

Here’s to stopping the negative and firing off the positive!

The Critical Three.

BREATHING + RELAXATION + IMAGERY.

I’ll repeat that.

BREATHING + RELAXATION + IMAGERY.

How about a little test to make sure we’re on the same page?

(Haven’t done one of these before. Fun.)

Fill in the blank:

The Critical Three are 1. ____________ + 2. ____________ + 3. ____________.

Nice.

We need to learn to BREATHE deeply. The way Leo-tai taught DC and that he teaches us: In through our nose deep into our diaphragm, filling up our belly and body with life giving oxygen. Slowly out thru our mouths—which are slightly open with our tongues lightly against the ridge behind the front teeth. Repeat.

Breathing is HUGE. Again it’s awesome to see Mark Divine say the exact same thing in Unbeatable Mind where he tells us: “To say that learning breath control is the most important component to forging mental toughness would not be an overstatement.”

Notice how you breathe throughout the day and especially in crunch situations. Shallow breathing creates (unnecessary) anxiety. THE best way to clear + get control of our minds is via our breath. It brings us out of looping thoughts and into our bodies and into the present moment. I’m practicing my deep breathing as I type this. Let’s master it!

OK. So, you’re breathing deeply. Fantastic. That helps you with the second of the critical three: Relaxation. We need to learn how to relax mentally and physically. DC walks us thru a great relaxation exercise he uses with all his clients. Genius.

OK. We’re breathing deeply. We’re relaxed. Now, it’s time for some imagery. Imagineering as DC calls it. That’s the focus of our next Big Idea.

For now, know that one of the primary reasons we want to breathe deeply and relax is so we can connect with and program our subconscious mind. THAT’s where our deepest mind power is.

Here’s how Heidi Grant Halvorson puts it in her great book, Succeed (see Notes): “Metaphorically speaking, if your unconscious mind can hold information equivalent to a NASA supercomputer, your conscious mind can hold roughly the contents of a Post-it note.”

Imagineering. So good.

DC shares a story about Pelé that he heard from Gary Mack (who wrote Mind Gym—see those Notes, too!). Apparently, Pelé was a HUGE imagineering guy.

An hour before *every* game Pelé would grab a couple towels and lay down somewhere in the locker room. He’d roll one towel up for a mini-pillow and use the other to cover his eyes. Then he’d go to work in his mind gym.

First, he’d bring to mind images of playing on the beach as a kid—seeing and FEELING (key word) the love and enthusiasm with which that little version of him ran around the soccer field.

Then, he’d imagine some of his best performances—where he demonstrated total mastery. He’d see it. He’d feel it.

Then, he’d imagine THAT day’s performance. The enthusiasm and love of his childhood and the mastery of his recent performances melded into an extraordinary performance in his mind for that next game. 30 minutes of imagineering. That’s what he did before every.single.game.

Then what? Then he’d walk onto the field and be unstoppable—doing precisely what he had just experienced in his mind. <— Amazing.

How about you? Ready to do a little (a lot?) more imagineering in your life?

P.S. Important distinction that came to me this morning as I practiced a little imagineering in my meditation: Remember to focus on the PERFORMANCE you want to have. NOT (!!!) the outcome.

Pelé didn’t spend 30 minutes imagining receiving a gold medal or a $1 million check at some point down the line. Those are OUTCOMES. He focused on what he was going TO DO. His PERFORMANCE.

In a culture obsessed with get-it-quick extrinsic outcomes (fame! wealth! hotness! power!) we, unfortunately, fail to actually commit to doing the GREAT WORK (lots of caps! :) required to *achieve* those outcomes.

So, let’s focus on what we’re going to do, how we’re going to show up, etc. and let the outcomes be by-products of our extraordinary performances.

How? Well, most of us aren’t athletes so it’s a little different/more challenging to imagine us at our best “performances.”

Here’s how *I* am doing it these days. I’m all about seeing how consistently I can follow John Wooden’s advice and “make each day a masterpiece.” I have a very clear sense of what a “masterpiece” perfect day looks for me.

Here it is: I wake up early (this morning = 3:27 am), meditate for 20 min, do a little yoga for 5 min, then create a PhilosophersNote (from the book I read the day before) all before the family gets up around 7 am. Then I hang out with Alexandra + Emerson as they get up, take the little man on an “adventure” (aka walk with the dog to the park! :) so dad has time to hang out with his son and mom has time to do her AM rituals like meditation + exercise). That’s “AM-1.” Then I get back at it for AM-2 where I do things like record MP3s, create PNTVs, check in on biz stuff, etc. That’s around 9 to noon. Then I shut off the computer, do a little napitation and read—which paces everything. I need to read a ton (!), obviously, if I want to be able to have fresh Note to work on. I throw in a hike or training and I’m done by 5, hang out with the family knowing I’ve put in a solid 10+ hours of work. Enjoy dinner, give the little man a bath, go on a family walk and get to bed around 7 pm. That’s a PERFECT day for me. That’s me performing at my best. That’s what I visualize with enthusiasm—seeing that goodness come to life in the same kind of way Pelé would have imagined dribbling a soccer ball around defenders and scoring another phenomenal goal.

Back to you. What’s your optimal performance look like?! Imagineer it. Groove it into your subconscious!

P.P.S. Heidi Grant Halvorson agrees. She tells us: “Don’t visualize success. Instead, visualize the steps you will take in order to succeed. Just picturing yourself crossing the finish line doesn’t actually help you get there— but visualizing how you run the race (the strategies you will use, the choices you will make, the obstacles you will face) not only will give you greater confidence, but also leave you better prepared for the task ahead. And that is definitely realistic optimism.”

Goals.

They’re super (!) important. All the great teachers—motivational and conservative researchers alike—remind us that focusing our intention on goals that inspire us is a key to optimizing our lives and actualizing our potential.

How are your goals? Firing you up? Stretch goals that make you work but not so crazy they make you snap? Let’s get clear on what we’re inspired to create and go do it.

“Self-belief,” I told him. Our eyes met and he glowed back at me.”

Self-belief.

It’s the engine that drives the whole show.

Henry Ford told us “Whether you think you can, or think you can’t, you’re right.” Modern scientists describe this belief in ourselves as “self-efficacy” and it’s the variable we can use to predict which evenly matched competitor will win in a close match.

Do you think you can? Or do you think you can’t?

Do you believe in yourself?

I believe in you.

Let’s do this!!!! :)